Do you enjoy a passionate marriage?
Or are you bored and wondering how to bring more excitement into your relationship?
“Vulnerability is one of the most powerful tools you can acquire as a sexual being, because it unlocks a lover’s storehouse of arousal and feeling. When you let yourself be known in a non-defensive way your partner becomes willing to connect with you in a full-being, intimate, and very turned-on way.”
Susan Bratton from Personal Life Media
Do you allow yourself to be vulnerable with your partner? I know it’s not easy. And somehow we might even think that it’s a sign of weakness. It’s really hard for me when I feel deeply hurt. I try, I fail, I try, I do.
Vulnerability is our feminine power. This is how we magnetise men into love. This is how we can create a passionate relationship, a passionate marriage. Being vulnerable requires a lot of courage. It’s scary to show what we really feel, what we are afraid of, and what we desire. And at the same time, this is what opens up the doors to multitudes of possibilities! To deep trust and intimacy, to passion and profound fulfilment.
First we need to turn towards ourselves and get in touch with what we really feel. And then express it with honesty and rawness. “This hurts.” – is vulnerability. “You don’t care about me! You never do what I need!” – is blame, cowardice and cover up of the vulnerability.
Can we create deep intimacy without showing who we really are? Without crying in pain, shaking in fear and screaming in ecstatic abandon with our partners? I don’t think so.
When I pretend I have it all together, I know the right way and he should realise that my way is the right one – the intimacy goes away with the smoke through our chimney. I’m right. I’m strong. I’m independent. And disconnected. And unfulfilled.
When I admit that actually, I’m scared and I hope that I’m doing the right thing, but I don’t really know, I’m just trying my best – I see the intimacy flying in with the butterfly.
I know that if I have a strong need to be right, I’m actually scared of losing control and being overwhelmed by my feelings.
What do I choose in this moment: to be right and disconnected or to be vulnerable and connected? When I put it in this terms, the answer is clear. I choose to create love and a passionate marriage.
Am I making sense? How is my English? Yes, this is what I think when I write. Should I pretend that I got it all together and know everything about relationships? The pull is strong. But do I want to be right and disconnected or vulnerable and connected at least to myself and my feelings?